Top 10 things that we’re too lazy to do
Top 10 Things That We’re Too Lazy To Do: 10. Laundry 9. Homework 8. Update our blog 7. Finish that...
But seriously, I am terrified
I’m going to take a moment, and speak to you all directly, not as funnies editor, but as myself, Tyler...
A guide to opera
These days, operas and operettas are buzzing on everyone’s lips. With the first weekend of “The Gondoliers” a success, “operas”...
Top ten April Fools’ Day headlines
10. Octomom’s Octuplets Each Give Birth to Octuplets 9. Economy Improves 8. Newspaper Headlines Are Now To Be Using Words...
Swooping up prey (jobs) like hawks
You’ve all seen the news, or at least the Daily Show: the economy is still in the metaphorical toilet. People...
Top ten rejected course offerings
10. BIBL 157: Herod to Jezebel: Biblical Names that No One Gives to their Babies 9. MUS 149: Getting the...
Purple colors the unrhymable
It has come to my attention that the word “doorhinge” rhymes with the word “orange,” which leaves the word “purple”...
Top ten jokes told badly
10. A chicken wanted to a cross the road, so it did. 9. A man walked into a bar and...
A.L.’s advice column
Dear A.L., First of all, I am so glad that you finally decided to start this column. I have so...
A spring break madlib
I’m sure you all know how madlibs work, right? Below is a list of terms that you/your friends/your enemies/some stranger...
Need some (arguably) good advice?
We have a strong commitment to quality here at the Record’s funnies page. That said, we have decided to “take...
Top ten things you can do to save the planet
Top ten things you can do to save the planet: 10. Do not bathe 9. Avoid drive-throughs (stock up on...
My fake spring break
You’d think that spring break would be a veritable gold mine for funnies ideas. After all, MTV has taught the...
Fall 2026Funnies Staff
Funnies Editors
Jacob Shenk jacobshenk@goshen.edu
Zeke Bodiker zekedb@goshen.edu