Out-of-context professor quotes
“When God set up the world, He did not say, ‘Oh, let’s make it easy for students...

Gradvice
We’ve given a lot of advice over the past few months, but if you allow yourself to take any of it...
Funnies ideas that didn’t make the cut
Wondering what ideas didn’t make the cut this semester? Well, here they are, along with the (very...

Crosswords with Caleb
ACROSS 1. Sign of spring 6. What gardeners often do to trees in early spring 7. Fuses together 8....

Menno thrift store or not?
As a Mennonite who has been to many a Mennonite hub across the country, I have stumbled into many...

Yes the squirrel was A.I. Their voice still matters.
Dear Editors, I have been a dutiful reader (and often editor) of The Record since my first...

Campus character doppelgangers
Do you ever get deja-vu from someone on campus reminding you of a TV show or movie character? It...

GC Squirrels express concerns over campus life
Dear Reader, Like you, I have been reading The Record, and like you, I have been disappointed in the...

Crosswords with Caleb
ACROSS 1. Live tweet? 6. Introvert, to the extreme 7. Actor’s comment to the audience 8....

Crosswords with Caleb
ACROSS 1. With 1-Down, game whose name comes from its sound 5. “America’s Finest News...

Laundry room etiquette
I typically try to refrain from doing laundry on the weekends, especially Sunday mornings, because...

The first ever Goshen College Rott spelling bee
In honor of the musical this weekend, “The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee,” we decided...

The Ps and Qs of being pretty, popular and polished
Do you crave attention? Do your peers consider you “cringe?” Are you self-conscious about your...

Senior superlatives!!
There has literally never been anything better created than Leah Kauffman’s senior recap...

Crosswords with Caleb
ACROSS 1. *Phony 5. Opposite of urban 7. “Waiter, I’d like to see ___” (2 wds.) 8...
Spring 2022Funnies Staff
Funnies Editors

Denver Beck denverab@goshen.edu

Leah Kauffman leahk@goshen.edu