Brought to you by the Convo Committee
First things first: you won’t get convo credit for reading this article. Sorry. Unless maybe you...
Kendall Friesen: the myth behind the man
A while ago, I encountered a certain individual who will remain anonymous when not referred to by...
Blue skies, more thighs
Much to the chagrin of people who hate happiness, sunshine, and baby animals, it’s hard to ignore...
Adjusting to a post-recital world
The American Heritage dictionary, arbiter of objective truth and language, defines “post-recital...
What about second breakfast?
I’m afraid it’s been some time since I’ve set foot in the West Lawn Dining Hall, still...
Men’s Chorus Escapes NOLA by Skin of Teeth
The stage is set: ten young men are huddled together in a cramped bathroom late at night. Eerie...
Whiteout, the tragic tale of four intrepid students
A story of adventure and intrigue on the high prairies. Setting: Goshen, IN. Time Period: Winter....
This story is not made up
Because I am extremely famous, sometimes I find myself doing photo shoots. On Sunday, one of these...
This weird fact about the Funnies page will blow your mind
As a Funnies editor emeritus, I experienced a shock when I perused Leah Landes’ Funnies article...
Super Bowl XLIX for Dummies
If you’re anything like me, you typically don’t even bother turning to the Funnies page until...
Thoughts on the Artistic Canon
One of the first things that pops up in my head when I think about art is how influential male...
$ea$onal $aving$
Well, it’s Tuesday night and I’m writing a Funnies article again. Unfortunately, my brains seem...
New Year, New You
As you may have heard, January is the beginning of a new calendar year and a new semester here at...
The Record, a reader’s guide
The Record is a remarkable publication. Every week a new issue of the paper comes out chock full of...
A Tale from China SST
“Okay. Sam. Tonight we will eat at a mutton restaurant!” my Chinese host father Mr. Xu...