Sketchy pizza at sketch house
House meals. You may have heard about them, eaten them, or even made them. Here at Sketch House, a beloved...
The life of a writing mentor, 7:55 to 10:01 p.m.
On the historic day of Thursday, October 10, I worked yet another grueling shift at the Writing Center. Loyal readership,...
Elevator music needed to fill awkward silence
According to several reliable sources of mine, a bizarre phenomenon referred to by some as “music” is making a comeback....
Homecoming Article
In a shocking development this weekend, hundreds of former Goshen students descended upon the Goshen campus like a pack of...
How to wink at strangers
I have a problem. I like to wink at people. What better way to show someone that you appreciate them...
Suave student executes flawless slapstick routine
After my 1 o’clock class, I casually hopped on my bike outside Newcomer, my home away from home away from...
The Uncommon cold
I assumed that I would be writing with a plan this week. It would have been a wonderful article, full...
Color schemers
There is very little reason to assume Goshen College’s school colors are anything other than purple and white—even though we...
A quarter for your thoughts
The floor has become your laundry basket and the mountain-high piles of clothing in your room have literally become a...
Faculty Quotes Out of Context 4/18/13
“It’s like some wild threesome… That’s a bad analogy.” – Kevin Gary “If you want to be sitting in a...
Hooray for May Term
They say, “Goshen College is good because, May Term.” Who says that? I don’t know. I made that quote up....
Conclusions of a failed thought experiment
As we near the end of an era here at Goshen College, I can’t help but reflect on the past...
Graduation top ten
Hello again, dear readers. I don’t know if you have realized this yet, but this issue of The Record is...
Inside/Outside Voices 4/11/13
“Eight months ago Becca Yoder returned from Peru SST. Eight minutes ago I picked a dead nit from Becca Yoder’s...
“All science is bias”
I recently had the wonderful opportunity to sit down with Josh Yoder, junior ecology and Literalism double major, and have...
Fall 2026Funnies Staff
Funnies Editors
Jacob Shenk jacobshenk@goshen.edu
Zeke Bodiker zekedb@goshen.edu