Asking about the Ask Desk
The Ask Desk holds much the same mystical role on GC campus as Westlawn Dining Hall, in that no one...
Watch Out: Fish
An event. Every generation has one. A singular moment from which all days afterward are reckoned....
Ohio Yoder Fails to Get Things Together
I found this picture of Martin Luther King, Jr. on my computer, and for a moment, I was confused....
The Annual Lament of a Warm Weather Lover
Ah yes, second semester. The time of the year when the reality of winter finally kicks in and you...
Ohio Yoder gets serious about being funny
I see you. Yeah, you, who just picked up this copy of the Record, skimmed the front page and then...
Our correct views on restaurants
Goshen: a center for quality dining in northern Indiana. Known for its quality restaurants like Tony...
‘Hilarious, Unenforced, and Useless’: The Greatest Sign on Campus That None Of You Have Heard Of
People walk by it all the time. Ignore it. Or better yet: they board by. At the very southern edge...
A Sonnet In Which I Describe How My Weakness For Shiny Hair Nearly Causes Me To Compromise My Standards As An Intellectual
When I first glimpsed you, weeks ago I thought for sure I’d found “the One.” You laughed and...
A Halloween Dental Disaster
I wish that newspapers had a feature where the picture is hidden until the reader is done reading...
Gossip Squirrel: ‘I was almost tricked into being a treat’
Hey squirrel, heeeeeeeeyyyyy! Tis the season for spooks, and in the spirit of the poor, unfortunate...
Nebraska: “It’s not for everyone”
Anyone who has talked to me for longer than five minutes knows that I’m from Nebraska. And if you...
The Good Restroom
Ah, what a place. A place of solitude and rest. A place of quiet and peace.A place where the hustle...
Some Reflections from Kick-off: By two best friends who are apparently not the best best friends
Lukas Thompson: My tree-shaped compatriot (Ben Meyer Reimer) and I were a little disappointed to not...
“I am one of the few”: a poem of sorrow
I am one of the few. One of those who struggles. Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday is a struggle....
A Public Confession of Love
To My Sidepiece, I’ve been cruel to you, and for that, I’m deeply sorry. I’ve used you and...