As Thanksgiving approaches, we should all be thankful for many things, but we should also begin to mentally prepare for the complex social situation that is Thanksgiving dinner with extended family. Here are my tips for dealing with any uncomfortable moment! 

When someone is being clueless about passing dishes

One of the key social skills of Thanksgiving is passing to your right. People who aren’t proactive about passing are violating a rule and should be told so. You are encouraged to make passive-aggressive comments like “Wow, it’s pretty surprising that I haven’t gotten the mashed potatoes yet … I wonder who’s in charge of that?”

When a family overachiever sucks attention from you 

This one should be obvious: create a ploy for attention! Start choking on some turkey or faint in the living room. One option I’m contemplating for this holiday season is to set a phone alarm that will go off during the meal just to disrupt the conversation. 

When conversation falls flat at the table 

Use every awkward silence as an opportunity to mention how Thanksgiving is a holiday built on the oppression of Native Americans, and how maybe we shouldn’t be celebrating at all. 

When your grandparents ask you if you’ve been attending church 

An impossible question. “Hmmm, well I have a lot going on, and I am aware of churches in the local area … wow, Grandma, where did you get that interesting vase?” 

When your younger cousin throws a temper tantrum

This is a great opportunity for you to look like the mature, thoughtful cousin in front of the rest of the family. You could start clearing the table and doing the dishes to look extra impressive. 

When someone brings up the election

This is a Code Red. Here are some phrases to keep in your back pocket: 

-“Believe it or not, I’m too young to vote.” 

-“We should just get a Bush back in the White House.”

-“I stopped following politics because I will be flying to Mars soon.” 

-“Thanks for the reminder to send in my absentee ballot.”

When you’re asked, “How’s college?”

Find the right balance between showing that you take yourself seriously but you’re still a funny teen with some personality. Talk about your new internship, but balance it with a relatable joke about drinking too much coffee. Or tell a funny story about something with your friends while offhandedly mentioning your TA position.