In recent months, there has been much discussion, buzz, drama and tea to serve on the topic of student housing.

Much to the relief of many students, worries were washed away in a very cordial email from Gilberto Perez Jr. (What a soothing man).

Prior to this email, however, we made a list of some alternatives to on-campus living that we considered to be preferable options.

We wanted to take the opportunity to share this list with you now in the case that you are an upperclassmen who does not yet have housing for next year selected and would like some ideas, or perhaps if you just want a laugh.

Either way, here’s our list of the top ten places upperclassmen would rather live than on-campus:

Witmer Woods*

The covered eating area at Fidler Pond

Under the bleachers at Goshen Middle School

Any off-campus natural landscaping

The center of the Polar Vortex

A house of cards

With their problematic grandparents at Greencroft

With their parents**

A dumpster***

An actual lighthouse****


*While this area is still technically owned by the college, it’s off-campus enough.

**If only they lived around here.

***There are some amazing food options available in this location.

****In our opinion, the best option.


We hope that you consider these as viable options for off-campus housing. Additionally, in the future, we hope the realization that the opportunity for students to have experience in maintaining a home before graduation may not be that bad of an idea.