I am an independent man. I don’t need no woman!

– Allegedly Grant Miller

Marshal’s beard holds many secrets.

– An anonymous, yet wise, woman.

Hi, this is Jared Miller, and I just wanted to let the campus know: if there is one thing I never have enough of, it’s paper clips. So if you have any paper clips laying around, I’d be be glad to take them off your hands. You can bring them to my room in Kenwood, or pretty much put them anywhere in the house – I can kind of sense the location of the paper clips and I’m just kind of short on them right now. Once again this is Jared Miller, okay, bye!

– Jared Miller