Hello, I would just like to thank you for filling me in on all the useless knowledge from Howell house that happens throughout the week. Without you, I wouldn’t know all this useless nonsense. So from the rest of the GC community, thank you. Sincerely, Rudy Litwiller.

– Allegedly Rudy Litwiller

Hello this is Josiah Simpson. I would just like to let you know that Adelphian is the best, and we really like going there because it’s really fun and stuff. If you’re looking for a good time, just head over to Adelphian; anyone is invited at any time!

– Josiah Simpson

Hello, this is Lance Armstrong and I just beat Rudy Litwiller in a bicycle race; he’s overrated. So I’m just saying if anyone wants to challenge me now that this performance enhancing drug stuff has come out, I’ll take you down.

– Lance Armstrong

Hey, this is Jared Miller and I just want to say that all of those fake callers of I/O voices that are calling as me, are stupid! It is a huge conspiracy!

– A very angry Jared Miller

Hi I/O voices, I need a ride to taco bell so, so bad. We were looking so hard, but everyone’s in bed; this is such a terrible time.

– A disheartened Grant Miller

Grace Boehm here. Jared, Grant and Dan are the worst. Especially at foosball.

-Grace Boehm

Hey, this is Grant Miller, and I just wanted to say that I am very disappointed that there wasn’t a Record last week.

– Dan Barwick

Hi, this is Jared Miller… duck. This is Josiah Simpson… duck. This is Michael Darby… duck. This is Andrew Glick… duck. This Josh Snyder… duck. This is Rudy Litwiller… GOOOOOSE!

– Jared, Josiah, Darby, Andrew, Josh and Rudy