How to wink at strangers

How to wink at strangers

By: Eva Lapp

Lapp practices her winking skills. photo credit: Mandy Schlabach

I have a problem. I like to wink at people. What better way to show someone that you appreciate them without using words? What better way to spread the love by offering something special that catches most people off guard? What better way to enjoy watching the recipient attempt to wink back at you?

I wink at friends I pass on the sidewalk. I wink at others during choir practice. I wink at my roommates – always. So, why is this a problem? Well, I enjoy winking so much, I sometimes find myself throwing a friendly wink to the wrong person at the wrong time!

I occasionally wear contacts. Those of you with contacts know that when your eyes dry out, you have to blink, and sometimes that blinking turns into – you guessed it – winking (or blinking with one eye without intending for it to become a wink). Let’s refer to this action as “bwinking.”

Episode 1: RA team meeting, last year. While discussing RA-related things on campus at 10 pm, Eva’s eyes start to feel dry. In an attempt to refocus, Eva bwinks her left eye while staring into space in Benson Hostetter’s direction. Benson proceeds to look bewildered and whispers, “Did you just wink at me?”

Episode 2: Biking through campus three weeks ago. While biking towards the Union, Eva’s eye starts to feel a tad dry. She realizes she is biking towards a boy she doesn’t recognize. Then, at the last minute before the appropriate-not-awkward-distance-apart-moment to say hello, the emerging sun attacks her already dried-out eyes, catching her off guard and causing her to – you guessed it – bwink. In a confused flurry of wanting to say hello and explain herself, Eva resorts to smiling shyly and breezes past said boy.

Friend, wherever you are out there, sorry for an awkward first encounter. I hope the next one is more along the lines of “What is your name? What is your major? Where are you living this year?” In any case, I hope we can be friends despite the unfortunately awkward but possibly intriguing first encounter.

Record
Record
Written by Record

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