Welcome to Goshen, Indiana, where the coffee is ethically sourced, the buggies outnumber the Subarus, and [number] out of [number] residents have strong feelings about sourdough.
Begin your visit at the Farmers Market, where you can buy [organic noun], [plural noun], and a vague sense of superiority for only $[amount]. If you’re lucky, someone in a wide-brimmed hat will hand you a hand-sewn [noun] and silently judge your footwear.Next, take a walk downtown, where you’ll pass [adjective] art galleries, at least three stores that only sell [plural noun], and a boutique that smells like [scent] and generational guilt. Make sure to stop at a café and run by someone named [hipster first name] who will serve you a kombucha flight and casually mention they used to live in Portland “before it got weird.”
If you hear clip-clopping behind you, don’t panic — it’s just an Amish buggy driven by an 11-year-old who could rebuild your transmission blindfolded. Smile and wave, but don’t expect a wave back. They have [religious noun] and a much stronger work ethic than you.
For lunch, choose between vegan shawarma, gluten-free pierogies, or a casserole made by someone’s grandma named [first name] who considers pepper “a bit spicy.” Bonus points if your table is made of reclaimed barn wood and comes with a free lecture about sustainable [plural noun].
Later, head to Greencroft, where the speed limit is “funeral pace” and the average conversation lasts [number] minutes longer than socially acceptable. If you hear someone loudly talking about [medical condition] in the produce aisle of Martin’s, don’t worry — it’s just Tuesday.
Before you go, swing by the Elkhart River, a majestic waterway known for its [adjective] color and mysterious smell. Legend says if you dip your feet in it, you’ll either receive lifelong clarity or a mild rash.
