As a kid, I was raised on a generous dose of rebels. Between “Star Wars,” “Lord of the Rings” and “The Hunger Games,” one of the things that I wanted most when I was younger was the chance to be a part of making history. To be a hero that stood up to injustice and fought the good fight even when it was hard. 

I felt this same type of longing as I got older and started learning local history, like the Kent State shooting that took place only about an hour from my house. 

 Some of this is the unfortunate result of growing up in a tradition that idolizes martyrs more than others. But, I was so sure as I continued to learn about student movements across history that I would be on the right side if I was only given a chance. That I could persevere through hard times and come out on the other side. I see now how hard it really is. 

To consider once again the significance of my childhood medium in this attitude, I was always baffled by the exchange between Frodo and Gandalf in “Fellowship of the Ring,” where Frodo says “I wish it need not have happened in my time.” Why would the protagonist of one of my favorite stories not want the adventure of a lifetime? The chance to defeat evil? The moment to become a hero?

I can understand it more now. There is also more comfort for me to find in Gandalf’s reply: “So do I, and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.” This goes beyond just using our time wisely, as I originally understood. Rather, we must make something of our moment even if it isn’t what we wanted. 

For a long time, I assumed that this unwanted time would be less eventful than what I hoped for, but now I have the hindsight to realize that it is far worse than I could have imagined. Suffering around the country isn’t noble, it’s just suffering. Evil isn’t abstract and conceptual, it’s real people making the choice to do harm every day. People who go home to their families and are good parents and active members of the communities they care about. 

In real life, problems are even bigger than our stories make them out to be, with messier solutions. And I barely have time to see my friends during the week, much less take a day off to protest or avoid going to classes. Sacrifices get a lot worse when you’re the one taking on the consequences. 

But at the same time, as Gandalf reminds us, we didn’t decide our moment. We have to make the most of what we’ve got, and that window is getting smaller every day.  Our rebellion might not look the same as the movies, but that doesn’t make it less important. It just means we all have to decide if we still care enough about being a hero — if it’s worth it when there’s more on the line than just stories.