A mass email was sent out to many women on the Goshen College campus. They were asked to provide the best piece of advice they have received. Women of all ages, races and cultural backgrounds were asked the same question, but the common denominator was the same: sharing the feminine experience.
“In the journey of womanhood, I’ve discovered that change is inevitable and s—- happens. That’s right, SHIFT happens! Life presents challenges, but with each shift, we adapt and rise. Throughout our transformative journeys, my advice is to establish boundaries, identify your support system, embrace vulnerability, and navigate each shift one day at a time.” – Aja Ellington
“Take the time to care for yourself as you take the time to care for others.” – Avilene Evangelista
“I have three pieces of advice. Don’t be in one-sided friendships where your love is not reciprocated. Know that you’ll find your true people eventually. It’s also important to recognize and celebrate our unique similarities and differences and support each other in solidarity. Lastly, be okay with saying no, especially Black women. You don’t have to shoulder everyone’s problems along with your own.” – Jakyra Green
“Not everyone offers their genuine selves to every situation; it’s not something that everyone is capable of at every given moment. The best thing that you can do is be honest with yourself and do what you need to do for you. The only person’s actions you can really depend on are your own.” – Sarah Miller
“Take more risks! Also, you probably don’t need to apologize as often as you are. :)” – Naomi Klassen
“Your worth is not defined by what you do. Something I always notice when interacting with any woman is our deep attention and sense of care about literally anything. For a long time I resented that part of myself. I blamed the crushing weight of patriarchy and misogyny for making me and other women care so much about our ability to provide and care so much about what we do, how we do it and how we look while doing it. Getting that reassurance from another woman reminded me that we all see and feel that pressure. There is comfort in being recognized without having to explain yourself.” – Eliza Alemán
“A great one my aunt used to say: ‘Why are you trying to buy a lesson when I am trying to give you one for free?’ Oftentimes our parents, grandparents, friends, etc. have been through the very thing you are going through or about to go through. They seek to warn you to turn around, stop, do not enter because they know the outcome. The lesson is going to cost you, oftentimes at a very high price personally, physically, mentally or emotionally. Listen to the warning, because it’s free.” – Cyneatha Millsaps
“Self awareness is the first step to self improvement. It’s okay if you’re still figuring out why your brain and heart work the way they do, but the best thing you can do is be aware of the reactions you have and the impact they have on the people you love.” – Aysia Adkins
“Take time to know, respect and love yourself. Be curious. Pursue your questions. Speak your truth. Your imagination is boundless. Your capacity to grow is ever-present.” – H. Roz Woll
“Your ability to hold yourself to a standard of care, while facing an extraordinary amount of pressure in your work, love and social life is astonishing. You flourish in moments of pressure and bat away the eyes of others that attempt to tear you down. Beautiful extraordinary woman, you are flourishing.” – Kennedy Stewart
“Besides putting God first, choose your friends wisely. Cultivate your circle so that it includes only those who inspire you to greatness and those who want the best for you. Surround yourself with people who see your worth and remind you of it when you aren’t feeling so worthy. The company you keep has an impact on your life choices. As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17.” – Solidia Brown
“This nation was founded by cisgender, white men to benefit cisgender, white men. As a female-identifying individual, or someone who identifies with the feminine experience, you have the unique ability to ask questions that no one else in the room has considered to ask, or did not have the privilege to question. With whatever privilege you may possess, may your feminine identity empower you to ask the questions, take up space and navigate the world in whatever capacity your soul desires. You deserve to experience a life that does not require your resilience around every corner, and may it also be a life where you are praised for all that you are, and not solely the efforts you have given in your fight for an equitable existence.” – Carmen Merino
Reporting by Isis Espinoza.
