G’day and vie bischt du and welcome back to campus for the new year! 

We are Nathan and Zeke, the funnies editors for this semester and your favourite Aussie and Amish duo on campus. 

This week, we are here to give you a couple tips and tricks to make the most of the fall at the big GC. So grab your horse, hook up your buggy and get ready for a wild ride. 

The most important thing to know about campus is where the best watering hole is, and there is nothing better in Northern Indiana than the famous Westlawn, commonly known to all locals as the Rott. 

Now, let us tell you that it’s nothing like a classic barbie; there probably won’t be any shrimp or snags — but if you were here during preseason, you know there will certainly be pasta. 

Now, pasta is good, but nothing beats a homemade Amish meal. Don’t worry though, you won’t have to dig up and peel your own potatoes. They are already mashed and supplied here. 

Our recommendation as two seasoned professionals in this place is that, on Friday arvos, hit up the Fraker. There’s nothing better than an end of week chook burger and the fish in Indiana ain’t as fresh as in the outback. 

Another Aussie classic that the Yanks at GC have in abundance are sporting events. During the fall, you can watch soccer (what a silly name for a sport where you use ya feet), volleyball or cross-country, but make sure to keep ya wits about you; the threat of being trampled by a pack of GC runners is almost as high as being eaten by a croc in the northern territories. 

You might notice that, here at GC, there is no football team, as no right-minded Amish man would support such a violent and reckless game. We prefer the simpler, slower sports, like slow-pitch softball and pickup basketball, where physical contact won’t be tolerated and Gelassenheit is strongly encouraged. 

We hope that these helpful tips will guide you when making decisions on where to eat and what to do on campus this semester. Please say g’day or vie bischt du if you see us around campus, but don’t ask us about wretched Kiwi’s on the other side of the ditch or those silly Mennonites with their electricity, and if you’re reading this online … no, you’re not. 

In all seriousness, up the All Blacks and catch us at your local game of Dutch Blitz. 

Have a great semester,

Your favourite Kiwi and Menno duo… 

 

G’day: Classic Aussie greeting

Vie bischt du: Hi, how are you?

Buggy: Amish mode of transportation

Watering hole: Local food spot

Barbie: Barbecue

Snags: Sausages

Arvos: Afternoon

Chook: Chicken

Yanks: Americans

Gelassenheit: Submission to God’s will; self-surrender

All Blacks: National rugby team of New Zealand

Dutch Blitz: A vonderful goot game!